Arthur Davis has spent the last three months living in a professional sex dungeon, and says that moving to the dank, dimly lit cavernous pit of inequity is the best decision he's ever made. "I lived with a psytrance promoter for over two years, and compared to that, living in a sex dungeon is paradise," says Arthur. "The dank dungeon that I now call home is much cleaner than my old apartment. Unlike that place, the floors of the dungeon aren't covered in paint, the walls aren't covered in splattered semen because my roommate actually cleans up after herself, and if any hippies show up unannounced, I get to whip them over and over again with a cat o' nine tails."

Arthur says he found his new apartment via Craigslist. "I was fed up of listening to psytrance every hour of every day, so I logged on to the net in search of greener pastures," says Arthur. "That's when I found an add that Madame Attila had put up. She was looking for a roomate who could help her around her dungeon." The intrepid young man decided to take a gamble, and called her up. "Helping a dominatrix brutalize people couldn't be any worse than living with a psytrance promoter."

Madame Attila, for her part, thinks that Arthur is the best roommate she's ever had. "Arthur doesn't ask questions. He does what he's told, and he's very good at following instructions. When I need help gagging an unruly client, he's right there beside me with a whip in hand, ready and willing to get to work."

Living in a sex dungeon isn't all fun and games, but Arthur says it's a big improvement to living with a promoter. "My old roommate would constantly wake me up at night with loud psytrance music. These days, it's the sound of Madame Attila making men and women scream that constantly wakes me up," says Arthur. "It's a huge improvement. People screaming in pain is easier on the ears."

The only thing Arthur regrets is not having found Madame Attila earlier. "Living with a dominatrix is much more satisfying than living with a psytrance promoter," says Arthur. "I just can't imagine living anywhere else than in a dungeon."